Here we are.
Which is where, exactly?
A little mountain village at the base of Mount Chirripo -- the tallest peak in Costa Rica.
There is a single road (the 242) that drives up from the pacific coast, through the central town of San Isidro de el General, and thirty minutes more up into the mountains.
Nestled up here at what is quite literally the end of the road, across numerous streams and rivers, and held by the green valleys of the Chirripo mountain range, I have found my home.
It's been a year since I was in Arizona - my birthplace, and the location that I spent most of my life. Thirty years I lived in that desert country, surrounded by flat dusty landscapes, dotted with cacti, and healthy doses of sunshine and dry heat. Twelve of those years spent in a three bedroom house in the Chandler suburb, a home that served as my college party kingdom, my bachelor pad for when I was a single mortgage banker, and - in my latest iteration of Grant - the temple and shala of my yoga school "Bridge the Gap Yoga". That home served many purposes over the years, and right up until I left in August 2020, it had become a major spiritual development center for myself and for dozens of tribe from the local community. Humans are constantly evolving.
I write today (and all days) with several intentions:
One: my writing is always my attempt to consolidate, integrate, and -- ultimately -- bring to light, through reflection, the lessons of my past. This is for the reader's inspiration as well as my own. May the many lessons of our twisting and turning lives bring more wisdom to this world.
Two: to convey, with as much detail as possible (or necessary) the intricate and magickal principles that sort of run "behind the scenes" in our life, in order to offer the reader (and myself) some bonus trust points in life. If we can all accrue a little more trust towards life, in general, I think we would all be a little better off...
Three: to bear witness to my own journey and my arrival to this Here, Now moment, which is -- quite honestly -- the best place I could ever imagine landing. I will explain more in future writings, but, in brief: I live in a truly epic location, surrounded by epic nature, in a very special hand-built home... the love of my life and partner of my dreams is my next-door neighbor... we cook delicious food together, drink hot elixirs made with local cacao, and make the most beautiful love together -- love-making that is deeply connected, intimate, and soul-enriching... my days are filled with the aforementioned activities and others that I love to do: yoga, meditation, breathwork, chanting, music, guitar, singing, writing, reading, walking in nature, sunbathing at the river... I am involved in incredible communities of individuals doing amazing things... I keep getting invited to bring my gifts into private events, where I get to create sacred space, offer sacred music and share my spirituality with people who are going through transformational journeys.... I feel my health increasing daily, as does my inspiration towards life and what is to come... in short, it is amazing. The life I am living is literally beyond my wildest dreams, and it keeps getting better.
Whew. Thank you for reading this so far (and thank you Grant for writing it!). I have come to understand that a large part of this process -- the process that has allowed me to arrive here -- has been a result of me owning my personal brand of magick and uniqueness.
And what a journey THAT has been!
Throughout it all, all the travels, all the crazy unfoldments, the synchronicities, the challenges, the hardship, the intense bouts of sadhana, the rituals, the ceremonies, the plant medicine journeys, the fasts, the retreat... the common theme through all of them has been learning how to love myself on deeper and deeper levels.
Which is my message for you, dear reader. Because you are worthy of being loved. You are worthy of all the magick that this life has to offer. You are worthy of the dreams you dream. The visions you have. And the way that you dance through life to arrive at another magickal moment is your path.
If we all knew that the dance itself - the way we walked from point A to point B - was as important as the arrival at the destination, we would make those steps more joyously, more ritualistically, more prayerfully.
If I could look back and see the processes I went through before arriving here, I would love a second chance at enriching those moments with even more gratitude and love, for they brought me to this moment Now.
Even though I did my best! I did my best. In all of the moments, I did my best.... to give them the attention they deserved, to offer to them my only gift in the life -- my full and undivided presence -- I did the best I could at providing this, in all circumstances. And I have grown a lot through them. I've grown a lot in my capacity for presence and attention, and I believe that this is precisely what has led me to this moment, now.
The challenges I have been through in life, which includes the challenges I put myself through voluntarily and consciously, have all been attempts at a soul level to increase my ability to be fully here. And as I become more aware of what it takes to become fully here, my eyes open to the possibilities that are in front of me. Fear starts to vanish and is instead replaced by wonder and awe towards the miracle of the mystery.
The Great Mystery of Life. It becomes more and more mysterious as I walk closer to the edge of the unknown. As I embrace the infinite challenge of the unknown -- which never quite makes sense, fully -- I lean into the abyss and fall forward into the next miracle.
Leaving the home that I'd lived in and loved in for TWELVE years -- a place that I had built several lives -- was not an easy task. Leaving behind a beautiful community of people -- a community that I was dedicated to serving through the epicenter of our yoga school -- was something that made zero sense.
Arriving to Costa Rica in October of 2020 with one backpack, one guitar, and one shruti box to start a new life was madness.
But something kept me afloat.
Something kept me going.
Limiting beliefs would tell me I was crazy for moving to a new and unknown country without a stable income, but I trusted. I put the mind-chatter aside and focused on something.... greater. Something divine.
I continued to engage deeply and wholeheartedly in my spiritual work. The work that helps me anchor in the higher vibrations of living and being in alignment with a greater truth than my self-limiting beliefs
That "greater truth" is still being revealed to me, and I can honestly and without shame say that I have a long, long way to go. I know that I am not yet embodying my highest truth, which means that there is a higher truth to embody. I know because I feel my potential and sense that I have not reached my full capacity as a human being. I sense that there is much, much more in store for me. I know that is true for all of us (with the exception, perhaps, of a few Self-realized masters and sages... and even then, are they "done"?)
If there is one thing that seems to become more and more true as I develop on my path, its that the "work" never ends. As human beings, we are bound by living, which brings us to the question "what do we do while we are here? What is the purpose of my 'living'?"
I would say that it is to manifest the fullness of our destiny. To reach our greatest potential. To achieve the maximum expression of human life. An expression that becomes the most beautiful possible addition to the tapestry of our interwoven existence.
In short, we are here to live our lives, fully. Leaving no stone unturned. Following our hearts. Singing and dancing fearlessly while also offering ourselves, in service, humbly and generously to our Earth and each of its inhabitants.
We are all destined for greatness in this way. Each one's outcome will be different than every others, but the light that shines from those who are authentically engaged in their path will be like a beacon for those around.
Which is precisely why I share openly and publicly about my life. In my 31 years of living, I've had a pretty epic experience in this body as Grant. And I want to make that known to all those who are interested in following their own path. My path is my own -- it is for me to walk, as is yours -- but I feel that we have a duty to share parts of it with others purely from the intention to invigorate and expand the possibilities for others.
We are at such an interesting time in our lives. There is a lot of fear in the air. perhaps this is a natural part of the process of life, I don't know and cannot say. But I feel strongly that instead of consuming more fear, we ought to turn our attention to consuming inspiration. We ought to be reading and hearing of success stories and possibilities. We can turn our attention wherever we choose, and it is our right to do so. But by collectively bringing our awareness to situations that uplift us we are shifting the tides in our favor. We are shifting the attention from feeding our fears to watering the seeds of potential that lie dormant within us all.
This is how it happened for me and it is what (and why) I want to share with the world. My own path has been filled with fear in many different ways (aren't all of ours?). But I kept focusing on what I wanted to see more of. I kept practicing and deepening into my practices in a way that nourished my soul and kept me going, despite the darkest of times. It has NOT been easy, and sitting here in my little paradise has been earned by every ounce of perseverance, but this has all allowed me to be as much of an embodiment as I can be for others on their path.
There have been many who've gone before me and served as inspirations to me, showing me what was possible. They live in my heart and appear when I need them most. Their spiritual presence is as real as the rising sun each morning. And there will be many who come behind them, myself included, perhaps you as well.
It is time we own our light, we own our path, and we own how far we've come. And by doing so, we set an example for others. Be humble, walk with your feet on the Earth, but keep the heart open to the Divine and the head filled with the expansiveness of possibility instead of the poison of fear.
This will be our ticket forward. Some will hate us, some will cast stones and try to burn us, some will tell us we are wrong, we are lacking in XYZ, we are too much (fill in the blank), or whatever other number of things the "others" will try to do to pull us down and away from our expansion. But I will say this -- keep expanding. Share -- vulnerably and honestly -- about your process. Share your wins with the world. Don't make it about others, focus on your own possibility. And in doing so, attract those who resonate with the light that you are shining.
We are creating a New Way together. Those who are ready will see the light, and build their own relationship to the true Source of that light, which is within each of us. And together we will walk forward, boldly and fearlessly, to overcome the inertia, ignorance and sluggishness that has crept in and stolen the hearts of our people.
Together we will set a new standard for living, one that is in truth, in alignment with nature, and connected to the natural values of life. It is everyone's right and privilege to seek this out, to seek out a better way of living, and to arrive at better situations through their own self-responsibility and intention.
As we step into the New Chapter, we take honest stock of our surroundings. And just like Noah's Ark, as the world becomes flooded and destroyed, we will bring with us only what is needed. Again and again we will do this, until we have the essential items for the new life we are creating. These are not material goods. They are spiritual values and the inner mechanisms that allow us to relate to one another with harmony, with peace, and with love.
Enough is enough. It is time we forge our new way.
Blessings to all and may the strength and fortitude of our teachers and ancestors be with us at this time.